Here's a tip. If you and your bros ever decide to “never stop filming,” reconsider. Not the filming – make the most of that graduation present – but whatever epic trek you are about to take. Something unsafe, and perhaps undead, is about to happen.
The story of ‘Dom Hemingway’ is a familiar enough one – a tough-talking safecracker endures years in jail, thanks to keeping a locked jaw when it comes to the involvement of his mastermind boss, only to be let loose to commit one last job and do right by his family – but Richard Shepard’s energetic and entertaining spin on what could be just another genre picture, along with star Jude Law’s bold and amusing performance as the eponymous antihero, make ‘Dom Hemingway’ a heist film with its own unique heart.
In the Drug Enforcement Administration of 'Sabotage,' there's an elite task force comprised of douchebags, jackasses, bullies and morally reprehensible goons. They're thrown the tough assignments; When a drug cartel kingpin needs to be brought to justice, John Breacher (Arnold Schwarzenegger) and his crew of hot-tempered, maladjusted soldiers storm his suburban fortress, pop two in his head, and beeline to the nearest dive bar for one-dollar Budweisers. When an unknown assailant starts picking them off one-by-one, it's hard to feel too bad for the band of brosefs.
The story of Noah as it is written in the King James Bible is about three pages. If you want to Google it, read it, then come back to this you can go ahead. I'll wait here as I continue to stream some of Clint Mansell's spooky and enthralling score to the new Darren Aronofsky film starring Russell Crowe.
Back? Yeah, so, not a whole heck of a lot there. But did you catch the tiny references to things you may not recall from Sunday School? The “giants in the Earth” and the “flaming sword”? These are the pools from which Aronofsky irrigates his 'Noah.' This is, to adopt a phrase, the “old, weird Bible,” and its visual language more resembles 'Lord of the Rings' than any typical sandal epic.
How much money would it take to convince you to walk into your neighbor's home and take a s--- on his kitchen floor? How much money would you pay to see someone else do it?
'Cheap Thrills' asks those questions and takes immense pleasure at imagining the answers. 'A Horrible Way to Die' producer E.L. Katz's directorial debut is a grisly exploitation film that extracts the greedy heart of human nature like its Mola Ram in 'Temple of Doom.' In a series of escalating stunts, horrible people provoke the horrible side of other mostly horrible people until they agree to act out horrible fantasies. 'Cheap Thrills' is not an easy watch, but Katz's loose tone allows the movie to swing between extreme vulgarity and comedic antics with little hesitation. It needs to — there's only so much pooping on the floor one stomach can take.
'Muppets Most Wanted,' a sequel to 2011's revival of the prismatic puppet gang, has shortcomings that could be easily swept under the rug. If only 'Muppets Most Wanted' stopped stuffing said shortcomings down our throats.
Springing forth from the same lineage of Katniss Everdeen, far removed from the toxically weak Bella Swan bloodline, ‘Divergent’ heroine Beatrice “Tris” Prior is well worth rooting for, even if her debut film isn’t as compelling as its leading lady. Based on Veronica Roth’s best-selling YA trilogy, Neil Burger’s film is cripplingly faithful to its source material, and although he and screenwriters Evan Daugherty and Vanessa Taylor have plenty of rich material to pull from, the film’s inability to distill it down to its most essential bits makes for a strangely bloated and often flatlining final product.
Yet, for its dragging run time – nearly two and a half hours – and its repetitive nature, ‘Divergent’ should both thrill fans and (hopefully) excite newcomers who will leave the theater wanting to know where its open ending travels next.
Those familiar with Jemaine Clement from his work on HBO's 'Flight of the Conchords' should be plenty excited for 'What We Do in the Shadows,' the new film he co-directed and co-wrote with Taika Waititi, who also worked with Clement on the indie film 'Eagle vs. Shark.' The pair reunite for this new venture, a faux documentary in the vein of the hilarious work of Christopher Guest -- but the eccentric group at the heart of this film is something a bit different: immortal vampires who happen to be flatmates, just trying to sort out normal life stuff while also dealing with being supernatural.
'What We Do in the Shadows' doesn't yet have distribution stateside, but that should be rectified pretty quickly. The film, the product of Clement and Waititi's brilliantly clever collaborative minds, is an insanely funny mock-doc that never skips a beat.
Kumiko is a lonely 29-year-old woman living in Tokyo who has fantasies of being a Spanish Conquistador. Increasingly pressured by her mother and her boss to find a husband and be a more successful woman, Kumiko finds escape in the Coen brothers' classic crime film 'Fargo,' and becomes obsessed with traveling to Minnesota to find the "treasure" Steve Buscemi's character left buried in the snow. 'Kumiko, the Treasure Hunter,' from Austin, Texas natives David and Nathan Zellner, is a charming, sad and existential contemplation on life film as escapism.
There are two chief takeaways from 'Ernest & Celestine.' The first is that in France and Belgium they don't have a Tooth Fairy, they have La Petite Souris, which is, basically, “The Tooth Mouse.” I also learned that when the story is funny, the characters are well-rounded and the world is imaginative, a modestly budgeted hand-drawn animated film can still have just as much effect as a big, blown-out computer generated affair.