CBS Finale Spoilers For All Your Favorite Shows!

We're definitely at that time of the season where all the network shows have started barreling toward their season finales, but still not quite far enough along that we don't have time to wait.  But why toll in uncertainty over the season finales' of 'Two and a Half Men,' How I Met Your Mother, and 'The Big Bang Theory,' when we've got the scoop right here?

Those rascals at CBS have seen fit to issue press releases for all three season finales of its flagship comedies, despite being weeks away from their actual air dates.  Still, audiences everywhere are wondering what will happen to 'Two and a Half Men's Jake once he (barely) graduates from high school or if Howard Wolowitz will make it either into space, or at least down the aisle with Bernadette!

And speaking of brides, when are we going to get some intel on Barney Stinson's blushing bride before the two-part season finale of 'How I Met Your Mother?'  The suspense is murder!

First off, let's take a look at what 'Two and a Half Men's ninth season finale "Oh Look, Al Qaeda!" has to offer...

JAKE IS PRESSURED TO MAKE A DECISION ABOUT HIS FUTURE, ON THE NINTH SEASON FINALE OF “TWO AND A HALF MEN,” MONDAY, MAY 14

Comedian Patton Oswalt (“The King of Queens”) Returns As Walden’s Ex-Business Partner

CHEAT TWEET: Will Jake be all he can be after graduation? #jakegraduates on the season finale 5/14 9pmET/PT @aplusk @MrJonCryer

“Oh Look! Al-Qaeda!” – Jake is pressured to make a decision about his future, on the ninth season finale of TWO AND A HALF MEN, Monday, May 14 (9:00-9:31 PM, ET/PT) on the CBS Television Network. Comedian Patton Oswalt (“The King of Queens”) returns as Walden’s ex-business partner.

GUEST CAST:

Patton Oswalt (Billy)

Next, let's check in on 'The Big Bang Theory' to see if any of Howard's plans for his future come to fruition, let alone any other twists and turns for the rest of the group!

WOLOWITZ ENTERS THE FINAL FRONTIERS – SPACE AND MARRIAGE, ON THE FIFTH SEASON FINALE OF “THE BIG BANG THEORY,” THURSDAY, MAY 10

NASA Astronaut Mike Massimino Guest Stars as Himself

CHEAT TWEET: Wolowitz, aka #FrootLoops, is go for launch & matrimony! Season finale #WolowitzWedding 5/10@8pm http://bit.ly/IPKUmy @Astro_Mike guests

“The Countdown Reflection” – When Howard and Bernadette decide they want to be married before his NASA launch, the gang rushes to put on a wedding, on the fifth season finale of THE BIG BANG THEORY, Thursday, May 10 (8:00-8:31 PM, ET/PT) on the CBS Television Network. NASA astronaut Mike Massimino guest stars as himself.

And finally, the mother load, tell us how the hour-long installment of 'How I Met Your Mother's seventh season finale will unfold?  Will the birth of Marshall and Lily's daughter be smooth sailing?  Will Barney go through with his mystery wedding?  Who's this girl Ted let get away?  Might she finally be the freakin' mother?  Read on!

MARSHALL AND BARNEY DESPERATELY TRY TO GET BACK TO NEW YORK WHEN LILY GOES INTO LABOR, ON THE FIRST PART OF THE ONE-HOUR SEVENTH SEASON FINALE OF "HOW I MET YOUR MOTHER," MONDAY, MAY 14

CHEAT TWEET: Lily's in labor! Will a drunk Marshall make it back in time for the birth? #BarneysBrideUnveiled 5/14 @8PM ET/PT

"The Magician's Code Part One" — While Marshall is in Atlantic City with Barney, Lily goes into labor, leaving him desperate to make it back to New York before the baby is born. Meanwhile, Ted and Robin try to distract Lily during her painful contractions, on the first part of the one-hour seventh season finale of HOW I MET YOUR MOTHER, Monday, May 14 (8:00-8:30 PM, ET/PT) on the CBS Television Network.

GUEST CAST:

Chris Elliot (Mickey)

Vicki Lewis (Dr. Sonya)

But it doesn't end there!  Keep going for part 2!

ON BARNEY'S WEDDING DAY, THE GANG REMINISCES ABOUT WHEN THEY ENCOURAGED TED TO CHASE AFTER THE ONE THAT GOT AWAY, ON THE SECOND PART OF THE ONE-HOUR SEVENTH SEASON FINALE OF "HOW I MET YOUR MOTHER," AT A SPECIAL TIME, MONDAY, MAY 14

CHEAT TWEET: Barney's wife is finally revealed and Ted connects with an old flame #BarneysBrideUnveiled 5/14 @8:30PM ET/PT

"The Magician's Code Part Two" — On Barney's future wedding day, when his wife is finally revealed, the gang reminisces about the time they encouraged Ted to follow his heart and go after the one that got away, on the second part of the one-hour seventh season finale of HOW I MET YOUR MOTHER, Monday, May 14, at a special time (8:30-9:00 PM, ET/PT) on the CBS Television Network.

Phew, can you believe all that?  Which finale are you most excited to see?  Give us your picks, or theories on how it all unfolds this May in the comments below!