ScreenCrunch Cereal of the Week: ‘Star Wars: Episode II’ Cereal

After a week off, the ScreenCrush ScreenCrunch Cereal Of The Week has returned.

Since the last edition of ScreenCrunch, there’s been a lot of ‘Star Wars’ news! So, in celebration of the newly announced cast of ‘Star Wars: Episode VII,’ let’s take a look at C-3POs Star Wars: Episode II Cereal.

The oddest thing about Episode II Cereal is that it’s called Episode II Cereal. Why isn’t it called Attack of the Clones Cereal? Are clones not tasty enough for the average cereal consumer?

Episode II Cereal seems to be consisted of your standard frosted puff, but is a bit vague on what, exactly, each marshmallow is supposed to represent. Best guesses: A green Yoda head, a Clonetrooper helmet, one of them kind of looks like the ‘Slave I,’ one of them kind of looks like Jango Fett’s helmet … actually, I’m going to stop because who cares, really?

It’s at this point in the piece that I will admit that writing about Episode II Cereal is about as exciting as watching ‘Episode II.’ Even the box cover just looks like overdone CGI. My favorite thing about Episode II Cereal is just the thought of a child asking his parents for breakfast pancakes, only to have the father yelling back, “Just eat some Episode II instead.”

“But I don’t want to eat Episode II again!”

“You’re going to eat your Episode II and you’re going to like your Episode II!”

“But I’ve had Episode II three times this week!”

“Episode II builds character! Eat it!”

Episode II Cereal didn’t create a fun commercial to promote its product (at least that I can find), hoping, I guess, the mad rush for any merchandise that just read ‘Episode II’ would be enough. Though, I did find this fun video of two chaps eating 12-year-old Episode II Cereal.

The verdict: No one at ScreenCrush HQ has ever eaten Episode II Cereal, so we don’t really know for sure. But, really, isn’t all cereal pretty good?

Next Week: Probably C-3P0s.