WookieeLeaks: ‘Star Wars: The Force Awakens’ Toy Images Have Leaked Online Because Of Course They Have

ScreenCrush’s WookieeLeaks is a weekly roundup of everything 'Star Wars'! From The Force Awakens, to the upcoming spinoffs and the TV shows, if it pertains to that long ago, far away galaxy, we’re covering it here, bringing you our expert analysis. This week, gaze upon the new Star Wars toys, compare the latest The Force Awakens news to the old rumors, and catch up on the latest Anthology updates.

The First Unofficial Look at The Force Awakens Toys

In the world of movie news, plot spoilers and character details are often spoiled months in advance because someone snaps a picture of a LEGO set that won’t even be on shelves until the movie hits theaters. It’s actually become something of a joke. No matter how hard the studios and filmmakers fight to protect their secrets, the toy companies always sabotage ’em.

Well, the same is becoming true of Star Wars: The Force Awakens. Disney and Lucasfilm probably wanted the first wave of action figures from the new movie to be revealed in style. They probably wanted fans to catch their first glimpse at these little plastic people on “Force Friday,” when toy stores are opening at midnight to accommodate rabid Star Wars fans. But nope. Instead, some guy has gotten has hands on the toys early and has snapped a photo. So much creating a fake holiday to reveal your toys!

The photos of the toys have been compiled here and it’s all of the usual faces. John Boyega, Daisy Ridley and Oscar Isaac have been immortalized in plastic as Finn, Rey, and Poe Dameron. You can imagine Adam Driver and Gwendoline Christie inside that plastic Kylo Ren and Captain Phasma armor. Chewbacca also has his another new action figure, as do Darth Vader and a young Luke Skywalker. Strangely absent from this first wave is Han Solo, but we imagine his new action figure won’t be far behind.

There are also a handful of cannon fodder toys, like Stormtroopers and a Flametrooper (a Stormtrooper with a flamethrower). There’s also a figure for a character named Constable Zuvio, but we literally have no idea who he is or why he has an action figure before Han Solo.

Some of the photos depict the back of each box and the character bio contained therein, but we’ve got to hand it everyone involved – between the deliberately vague copywriting and the lackluster photography skills on display, there’s not much new information to chew on. Unless you consider Kylo Rey having a “fiery temper” grand, exciting spoilers. He’s a Sith warrior. Of course he’s perpetually pissed off.

Speaking of Kylo Ren, prepare to see a whole bunch of miniaturized versions of him coming to your door demanding candy. The number of Darth Vader Halloween costumes in existence prove that kids love wandering their neighborhoods dressed as cruel fascist sci-fi lords, so expect this guy to fit right in.

Oh, and the marketing deluge for The Force Awakens will extend far beyond toys and stuff for the kids. Lucasfilm has announced “brand partnerships” with CoverGirl, Duracell, General Mills, HP, FCA US, Subway, and Verizon. Even if you want to take a break from Star Wars, you won’t be allowed. Everything will soon be Star Wars, from your eye shadow to your meatball sub.

Parsing Through the Latest News

Over the past few days, a deluge of details concerning The Force Awakens have hit the internet in conjunction with an upcoming Entertainment Weekly cover story. And other details have arrived just because. We have covered each of these stories separately, but this is space for the serious fanatic. Let’s take a quick second look at each of these stories and see how they measure up to known spoilers and speculation.

Naturally, spoilers and speculation follow. Skip to the next section if this isn’t your thing.

1. The Secrets of Kylo Ren

Although the exact nature of Kylo Ren remains a secret, director J.J. Abrams dropped a series of hints about the character. His name is a title. He has a strange connection to Darth Vader. His crazy lightsaber was built from scratch. He’s complex and driven by motivations that aren’t totally evil.

Taken alone, these details aren’t spoilers, but once you combine them with the in-the-open secret that Kylo Ren is actually Han Solo and Leia Organa’s son, everything starts to make sense. He has the same affinity for the Force as his grandfather (Anakin) and his uncle (Luke). He’s a complicated fellow because he’s turned his back on his family. His name is a title because his actual name is a huuuuge spoiler. And if you want to really dive into spoilers (this is your last warning), this will lend some serious heft to the conclusion where he strikes Han, his own father, down.

2. J.J. Abrams Won’t Return For Episode IX

Despite rumors that Disney and Lucasfilm wanted him back, J.J. Abrams has officially shot down reports that he’ll return for Star Wars: Episode IX. This means that each entry in the new trilogy will be helmed by someone new, as Rian Johnson won’t have time to finish Episode XIII and get to work on Episode IX, even if he wanted to.

That brings us to that rumor that Jurassic World director Colin Trevorrow is the studio’s new first choice for Episode IX, a rumor that ma very well be confirmed at Disney’s D23 convention. Or maybe not. They literally have years to make this decision.

3. A Bunch of New ‘The Force Awakens’ Images

A new gallery of stills has arrived, so let’s do the sane thing and see where each one takes place in the movie according to spoilers. We reserve the right to be totally wrong about all of these.

That’s Rey and Finn on the run from First Order Stormtroopers, who aren’t too happy about one of their own (Finn) going AWOL. They will supposedly escape the city in the Millennium Falcon, leading to the aerial battle glimpsed in the trailers.

Since Kylo Ren is in the snow, this shot is probably from the climax, where he duels Finn and Rey in the woods outside his castle/stronghold.

Finn, still in his Stormtrooper uniform, has just escaped from his Star Destroyer with the help of a captured Poe Dameron. Their hijacking of a TIE Fighter can also be seen in the trailers.

No clue about this one, but awww, BB-8 is going in a carrying case!

R2-D2 and C-3PO don’t have large roles in the film, but they’ll supposedly pop up and hang out in the latter half of the film when the new characters meet up with the original cast.

This shot of Kylo Ren and his Stormtroopers looks to be from the rumored opening scene of the film, where he invades and destroys a settlement on Jakku.

That’s Domhnall Gleeson’s General Hux, who appears to be on Star Destroyer.

Hey, it’s Captain Phasma!

The Latest Anthology Updates

In news that had the internet breathing a big ol’ sigh of relief, Lucasfilm president Kathleen Kennedy revealed that Phil Lord and Chris Miller’s upcoming young Han Solo movie will not star a child:

He’ll definitely be probably in the high teens, low 20s. We’re not introducing you to a 10-year-old Han Solo.

Jake Lloyd 2.0 averted. Whew. This movie sounds like a less terrible idea with each passing minute.

Elsewhere, Kennedy confirmed that Josh Trank’s Boba Fett spin-off movie is still in development, even though Trank himself has been kicked to the curb:

...It’s still one of the stories that we absolutely want to tell. There is a lot of innovative technology in and around what it is we’re doing with that story, so for a lot of reasons, we were comfortable postponing that. But we’re definitely still developing it.

But enough about movies that are years away! How about the movie that is only a single year away, Star Wars: Rogue One? The increasingly diverse and international cast has reportedly added Chinese actor Jiang Wen to the ensemble. The question now is whether Gareth Edwards’ film features two Asian characters or if he’s taking the part previously offered to Donnie Yen.

And finally, some new shots of the Rogue One set have made their way online. There’s a tropical region, a whole bunch of destruction, and a lot of Stormtroopers.