Flagship Entertainment, the new joint Asian-production venture from Warner Bros. and China Media Capital, has now pinpointed a can’t-fail strategy for total domination on the battleground of the Chinese cineplex: Adam goddamn Sandler.
China’s been ahead of the Western curve for some time now. The U.S. economy cowers before the might of Chinese manufacturing prowess, and some of Hollywood’s most popular blockbusters have catered to Eastern tastes. By 2025, we will all have a workable knowledge of Cantonese. But for now, China has made its latest leap forward in the field of etiquette, more specifically movie theater etiquette, and even more specifically, how to deal with a-holes who won’t stop using their cell phones during a movie. Polite whispered requests, chair-nudging, chair-kicking, and in-theater doxxing have all proven ineffective in the continuing war on America’s rudest audience members. China’s contrived a smarter, more futuristic mode of combatting these menaces.