The trailer for Halle Berry’s new thriller Kidnap opens with a mother playing Marco Polo with her son in a crowded playground. Can you guess what will happen next?

Louis Preto’s Kidnap is exactly what it sounds like, a kidnapping thriller about a mother who will, to quote the synopsis, “stop at nothing to rescue her kidnapped son.” Berry would certainly be great in the role of a badass mother speeding her minivan in reverse on the freeway to save her son, but oh boy is this trailer jam-packed with bad exposition.

Here’s a taste of Berry’s lines once her character’s son gets kidnapped: “They’ve got my son!” “Where the hell is my phone?” “Don’t hurt him.” “Thank god, the police!” Mind you, she is saying all of this to herself while alone in a car. I get that people talk to themselves, especially in times of such crisis (heck, I know I do), but does a movie need that much exposition? Ugh, Oscar winning actress Halle Berry, why?

But hey, I’ll give Kidnap the benefit of the doubt. It could turn out to be fun. It sort of looks like a less exciting, less clever version of Cellular, just with Berry instead of Chris Evans. If anything Kidnap makes a good case for the minivan as the ultimate high-speed chase vehicle. Just look at all the tricks Berry can do with automatic sliding doors! Kidnap opens December 2.

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