The Emoji Movie

These animated films are unwatchable.

Does anyone have a napkin? Because these movies got served.

Last month, Saudi Arabia announced they would be lifting their 35-year cinema ban nationwide, re-legalizing movie theaters and bringing in content and entertainment from the West.

Pixar’s ‘Coco’ and ‘Cars 2,’ ‘The Boss Baby,’ and, yes, ‘The Emoji Movie,’ have all been submitted for the Oscars’ Best Animated Film.

With two new releases and a third movie switching from a limited to a wide release, this was a weekend of big changes at the box office. Gone are familiar stalwarts like Wonder Woman and Baby Driver, and in its place are (with respect) the also-rans of summer, a few genre-driven films looking to carve out a name for themselves in a time of year devoid of major blockbuster releases. Here are the numbers as of Sunday afternoon:

Police in New Jersey are looking for a man who allegedly did something extremely inappropriate during a showing of the new children’s film.

We collected the funniest reviews of ‘The Emoji Movie’ and made a trailer featuring the best lines.

Be honest with me: did you really want to see a picture of The Emoji Movie at the top of this article? You had to be hoping that Atomic Blonde or Dunkirk would hang strong enough to keep The Emoji Movie from finishing in the top spot of its opening weekend, right? Well, good news for you: it’s not the highest-grossing movie in America this weekend! Has there ever in the history of Hollywood been a box office one-two as disparate as Dunkirk and The Emoji Movie? Actually, don’t answer that, I don’t want to know. Here’s the projected grosses as of Sunday afternoon:

No other wide release this year has gotten a 0 on Rotten Tomatoes - but ‘The Emoji Movie’ has.

It would be fitting if there were no words to describe The Emoji Movie; if the ephemeral experience of consuming this unique entertainment could only be summarized in a small picture dashed off in a text message. But, no, there are plenty of words that can describe The Emoji Movie. Here are a few of them: Boring. Unfunny. Mercenary. Saccharine. Arduous. And, of course, crappy. If you prefer the poop emoji that works too.