Austin Powers in Goldmember is not a very good movie. Most of the jokes, when there are jokes at all, are callbacks to the previous two Austin Powers. Whole scenes consist entirely of co-writer/star Mike Myers riffing, usually with himself, about random subjects like moles or poop. The plot barely exists; its time-travel component makes absolutely no sense whatsoever. Goldmember is the cinematic equivalent of a cubic zirconia. It bears all the superficial features of a movie. But something, something crucial yet invisible, is missing. There’s basically no reason to watch it — except one, and that’s the movie’s big plot twist which, 13 years later, became the big plot twist in Spectre.
Y’know those back to school ads for Staples? The ones that repurpose the Christmas standard “It’s the Most Wonderful Time of the Year” to celebrate children going back class? I always hated those ads as a kid. Going back to school was not a time to celebrate. It was a time for grief and mourning.
What’s up with the Demogorgon’s egg? What’s that mysterious ash raining over Upside Down? How much worse could Barb’s death have been? All these questions and more get answers, as we talk to the concept artists behind Netflix’s ‘Stranger Things’ and debut exclusive photos.
Here’s a sample of the angry comments I’ve read in the last 24 hours about the rumor that Zendaya will be playing Spider-Man’s long-time love interest, Mary Jane Watson, in Jon Watts’ Spider-Man: Homecoming.
Okay, so it was one of the worst summer movie seasons in recent memory. Trying to find the good blockbusters amongst the last four months releases sometimes felt like trying to find a needle in a stack of s---. But even this year there were diamonds in the rough. Today we’re celebrating the ten best, the summer movies of 2016 that didn’t make us weep for the future of cinema — and note that this list is just movies that got wide releases in at least 500 theaters. We’ll have a separate piece on under-the-radar summer films you might have missed next week on ScreenCrush. In the meantime, let’s celebrate the highlights from a depressing summer before we clear the decks and get ready for the fall.
Suicide Squad has only been in theaters for a week, but it’s already become a flashpoint for fan discussion. (And yes, that was a DC pun, thank you very much.) Does the movie’s plot make sense? Does it matter? How much of David Ayer’s original vision wound up in the theatrical cut? And maybe the most contentious debate of all: Is the movie better than Warner Bros.’ previous entry in the DC Extended Universe, Batman v Superman: Dawn of Justice?
UnREAL hasn’t always been tidy in its storytelling, but the messy quality of its characters — specifically Quinn and Rachel — are part of what makes the Lifetime series so painfully relatable and endearing. Unfortunately, Season 2 was just plain painful to watch as the show transformed into an ouroboros of melodrama, blatantly manufacturing its shocking twists and ultimately becoming the very thing it originally set out to deconstruct: An exploitative feat of narrative engineering. Spoilers to follow.
The box-office records it demolished over the weekend aren’t the only broken parts of Suicide Squad. For all its admittedly impressive financial success, the movie’s story is shockingly incoherent, and that’s when the film has a story at all. Sure, Will Smith was great and Margot Robbie made an impressively committed Harley Quinn. But in much the same way the Suicide Squad is held hostage in Midway City by sinister bureaucrats, Smith, Robbie, and company are trapped in a movie that gives them very little play and makes even less sense.
There’s almost no such thing as a surprise anymore. We’ve become saturated by a surplus of information, a culture obsessed with being in the know, constantly living in anticipation of an arrival. Not a day goes by when you don’t see a new movie trailer online, pass a TV show poster on your morning commute, or see a musician promote their upcoming album in a viral late night clip. We’re always informed of what’s up next, an awareness of the impending future that has driven the element of surprise to near extinction. But in 2016 something different happened in the entertainment world.
This looks like a job for Superman. Too bad he’s dead.