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Trying Not to Cry During ‘The Fault in Our Stars’: A Live Blog

20th Century Fox

On the afternoon that I saw ‘The Fault in Our Stars,’ I was in a miserable mood, for reasons that I won’t even begin to explain here. In other words, I was in no mood to cry. Like, none. And all I kept hearing was how sad this movie was making people. If I had to sit through a movie on that particular day, I would have preferred to see something with a lot of explosions.

Well, of course, the movie is going to be sad because it’s about two teenagers – Hazel (Shailene Woodley) and Augustus (Ansel Elgort) — who both have cancer. But that doesn’t necessarily mean that I’m going to cry, considering the mood that I was in on this particular day for this particular afternoon screening. If there were ever a day that I had a wall of impenetrable emotions built in front of me, this was the day.

So, about that, here’s a running diary of me trying not to cry during ‘The Fault in Our Stars.’

2:30 p.m.: Not crying.

2:35 p.m.: Not crying.

2:40 p.m.: Not crying.

2:45 p.m.: Not crying.

2:50 p.m.: Not crying.

2:55 p.m.: Not crying.

3:00 p.m.: Not crying.

3:05 p.m.: Not crying.

3:10 p.m.: Not crying.

3:15 p.m.: Not crying.

3:20 p.m.: Not crying.

3:25 p.m.: Not crying.

3:30 p.m.: Not crying.

3:35 p.m.: Not crying.

3:40 p.m.: Not crying.

3:45 p.m.: Not crying.

3:50 p.m.: Not crying.

3:55 p.m.: Not crying.

4:00 p.m.: Oh, no.

4:05 p.m.: Why?

4:10 p.m.: What the hell?

4:15 p.m.: Oh, my God!

4:20 p.m.: Make this stop.

4:25 p.m.: Ugh.

4:30 p.m.: My face is wet.

4:35 p.m.: Stop looking at me.

Mike Ryan has written for The Huffington Post, Wired, Vanity Fair and GQ. He is the senior editor of ScreenCrush. You can contact him directly on Twitter.

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