The 2016 Razzie Awards have been announced and Adam “The Sandman” Sandler leads the pack with a rare double nomination in the Worst Actor category, for his combined efforts in The Cobbler and Pixels — we can only assume that as an online-only release, Sandler’s performance in The Ridiculous Six was ineligible, and prevented him from earning the coveted hat trick of crappiness. Along with PixelsPaul Blart 2, Fantastic Four, Fifty Shades of Grey and Jupiter Ascending fill out the most hotly contested race of Worst Film. (Fair warning: Jupiter Ascending is secretly good, and its inclusion on this shortlist is only indicative of the selection committee’s tendency to follow critical or public consensus rather than inspecting each film on its own merits.) More deservedly, both Johnny Depp and Gwyneth Paltrow picked up Worst Actor/Actress nominations for their participation in the reprehensible Mortdecai.

Something moviegoers don’t quite realize when walking out a clunker such as Fantastic Four or Paul Blart: Mall Cop 2 is that neither of these even come close to being the worst film of the year. They’re both crazy bad, but the film of any given year is probably some independently-produced monstrosity with a limited release that will ultimately be seen by approximately twelve people. (For my money, 2015’s worst would be something like the putrid romantic comedy What Now. There is a good reason you have never heard of it.) The worst movies of the year won’t even make it to neighborhood cineplexes, instead rightfully doomed to a quiet and little-noticed death in VOD no-man’s-land.

Keeping this in mind, the true mission of the Golden Raspberry Awards becomes clear. In the same way that their bizarro-world counterpart the Academy Awards recognizes excellence within a narrow and specific parameter defined in part by star power, the program colloquially known as the Razzies recognizes only high-profile badness, mostly in a transparent effort to embarrass the A-listers involved.

Read on for the full list of nominees below, and carefully reflect on how we ought to identify and measure badness on film. (You deserve better, Dakota Johnson.)

Worst picture
Fantastic Four
Fifty Shades of Grey
Jupiter Ascending
Paul Blart Mall Cop 2
Pixels

Worst actor
Johnny Depp, Mortdecai
Jamie Dornan, Fifty Shades of Grey
Kevin James, Paul Blart Mall Cop 2
Adam Sandler, The Cobbler and Pixels
Channing Tatum, Jupiter Ascending

Worst actress
Katherine Heigl, Home Sweet Hell
Dakota Johnson, Fifty Shades of Grey
Mila Kunis, Jupiter Ascending
Jennifer Lopez, The Boy Next Door
Gwyneth Paltrow, Mortdecai

Worst supporting actor
Chevy Chase, Hot Tub Time Machine 2 and Vacation
Josh Gad, Pixels and The Wedding Ringer
Kevin James, Pixels
Jason Lee, Alvin and the Chipmunks: Road Chip
Eddie Redmayne, Jupiter Ascending

Worst supporting actress
Kaley Cuoco-Sweeting, Alvin and the Chipmunks: Road Chip and The Wedding Ringer
Rooney Mara, Pan
Michelle Monaghan, Pixels
Julianne Moore, Seventh Son
Amanda Seyfried, Love the Coopers and Pan

Worst remake or sequel:
Alvin and The Chipmunks: The Road Chip
Fantastic Four
Hot Tub Time Machine 2
Human Centipede 3
Paul Blart Mall Cop 2

Worst screen combo
Miles Teller, Michael B. Jordan, Kate Mara and Jamie Bell, Fantastic Four
Johnny Depp and his glued-on mustache, Mortdecai
Jamie Dornan and Dakota Johnson, Fifty Shades of Grey
Kevin James and either his Segway or glued-on mustache, Paul Blart Mall Cop 2
Adam Sandler and any pair of shoes, The Cobbler

Worst director
Andy Fickman, Paul Blart Mall Cop 2
Tom Six, Human Centipede 3
Sam Taylor-Johnson, Fifty Shades of Grey
Josh Trank, Fantastic Four
Andy and Lana Wachowski, Jupiter Ascending

Worst screenplay
Simon Kinberg, Jeremy Slater and Josh Trank, Fantastic Four
Kelly Marcel, Fifty Shades of Grey
Andy and Lana Wachowski, Jupiter Ascending
Kevin James and Nick Bakay, Paul Blart Mall Cop 2
Tim Herlihy and Timothy Dowling, Pixels

Razzies redeemer award
Elizabeth Banks
M. Night Shyamalan
Will Smith
Sylvester Stallone

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