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‘Nurse Jackie’ Review: “Kettle-Kettle-Black-Black”

Nurse Jackie
Showtime

Resident ER pill-popper, Jackie Peyton is back in ‘Nurse Jackie‘ – and so is her endless repository of lies. Last we saw Jackie Peyton, she kicked her husband, Kevin out after he admitted to having an affair, came to terms with her daughter, Grace’s battle with depression and was made to pee in a bag by supervisor, Gloria Akalitus.

As we catch up with present day Jackie, we see her dealing with the somewhat demoralizing process of checking into a rehab facility where even her tube of toothpaste is confiscated. As the administrator explains, nurses are known for doping Crest with Oxycontin. And if anyone’s gonna pull a stunt like that, we know it’s Jackie.

As we flash back to twenty-four-hours earlier, we learn that All Saints has been bought out by a large private company, O’Hara is looking “puffy” and Eddie is ready to take things to the next level with Jackie by presenting her with a weed he plucked from a nearby church. Aww, Eddie.

Not one to welcome romantic overtures, Jackie coldly dismisses Eddie’s attempt to take their relationship past a break time booty call. Akalitus saddles Jackie with overtime when Slater is a no-show and she mistakes a dog groomer for a nurse. But Zoe let’s the girl know that she’s taken with her canine-themed scrubs.

Later that night, Jackie has a  literal run-in with Dr. Mike Cruz, Quantum Bay’s impending replacement for Akalitus, as Jackie loads up on rations for the dog groomer and her boyfriend. Outside All Saints, Eddie reverts to stalker mode, waiting for Jackie to emerge from the hospital. When he asks her if she was just using him for his pills, she replies “probably, I guess, I don’t know.” Jeez, if you’re gonna break the guy’s heart, at least give him an anesthetic.

That night, Jackie seeks comfort at church but instead finds a crackhead who she decides to take home. With Kevin watching the girls for the night, Jackie brings her new friend back where he promptly ODs. Once again, Jackie leans on O’Hara to help clean up her mess, with a little help from the clueless duo of Lenny and Zoe. Jackie finally realizes that with a dead guy in her living room, maybe it’s time to go to rehab.

The next day, Jackie hooks the dog groomer’s boyfriend up with meds while O’Cruz unceremoniously introduces himself to the staff. He then pays Akalitus a visit, to inform her of her limited options now that the company he works for, Ouantum Bay has taken over.

Eddie decides now is a good time to let Kevin know he’s been screwing Jackie for the past few years. Meanwhile, O’Hara lets Jackie know that she’s pregnant, right before she walks into rehab for the next twenty-eight days.

We knew it was a matter of time before Eddie broke down and let Kevin in on the worst kept secret in All Saints history. But I didn’t expect four seasons worth of build-up to end with such an anti-climactic confession. Then again, with all the craziness surrounding Jackie, her screwing Eddie is almost trivial at this point.

And while Jackie attempts to address her drug problem in rehab, she’s still neglecting her real addiction to lying. I can’t help but feel equally empathetic and appalled by Jackie’s pathological lying. The ends have always justified the means with Jackie and most of the time, that’s a good thing. But after three seasons, it’s become clear that while Jackie can be incredibly kind to total strangers, she’s mostly an A-class a–hole to the ones she loves.

Rehab may help get Jackie off the pills, we know that the real problem remains unanswered. Who is Jackie Peyton? What does she want? And where does it leave her family? Whether or not we get the answers to those questions this season, I’m totally onboard to watch Jackie bounce down that shaky tightrope she calls the “truth.”

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