‘How I Met Your Mother’ Review: “Twelve Horny Women”

‘How I Met Your Mother’ Season 8 doles out judgement with its eighth episode of the (potentially) final season “Twelve Horny Women,” as Marshall battles former buddy Brad ('True Blood's Joe Manganiello) in the court case of his life to defend Frog Lake, while Barney, Robin, Lily and Ted debate which of them stand as the biggest badass.

Last week’s ‘How I Met Your Mother’ episode “The Stamp Tramp” saw Barney enlisting Robin to help him decide on a new strip club, while Marshall stuck up for a down and out Brad to his boss, and Ted searched college tapes for evidence of his former cool, so what did tonight’s episode bring?  Are we any closer to learning how the last year for Ted, Robin, Barney, Marshall and Lily plays out?

Read on for your in-depth recap of everything you need to know about ‘How I Met Your Mother’ season 8 episode 8, “Twelve Horny Women!”

A little ways down the road, Marshall sits before the State Judiciary Committee, preparing to discuss his court conduct during the Gruber Pharmaceuticals trial.  Marshall begins his story by catching the committee up on last week’s events with Brad, before explaining that Brad had decided to become a more ruthless lawyer following his most recent break-up.  Even with their brunch bros bond dissolved, Marshall vows to win the case.

Later at MacLaren’s, Ted explains to the gang that he’s called in sick for all of them in order to attend Marshall’s trial, while Robin and Barney continue to be awkward after their recent kiss.  Barney wishes not to go to the trial, given his history of appearing in the court, leading the gang to debate which one of them has the most bad-assery to their name.  Lily claims to be the worst of all of them, remembering her days brandishing a baseball bat and a long coat, children fleeing as she walked down the street, before intimidating a young Scooter (David Burtka) into hanging out with her.

While Marshall takes comfort in his cause’s moral ripple effect through future generations, imagining a fishing trip with young Marvin, Ted claims to be the biggest badass, given his past arrest and mugshot.  Lily has him beat however, once drinking underage with Scooter, and slapping a cop for getting involved.  Meanwhile, a bailiff at the courthouse recognizes Barney for his previous appearances in handcuffs.

Marshall’s trial begins, and what seems like a simple victory quickly delves into Brad using his chiseled good looks to pander to the female jury, and even the male judge.  As Future Marshall continues explaining to the committee, Brad spared no expense in eliciting sympathy for his breakup, and using phony doctor witnesses, though Marshall managed to hold his own by introducing an innocent duckling ravaged by the pollution of Frog Lake.  His good will is quickly squandered however, as Brad shows the jury a video of himself sexily frolicking about the lake, even finding gold in its midsts!

Outside, Lily bemoans that the court doesn’t have a record of her past deeds, while Robin throws her own past into the ring, trashing Canadian hotel rooms with a raucous party in her previous identity of Robin Sparkles.  Inside the court room, the case seems lost until Marshall notices Brad itching from a rash, and calls him as a surprise witness.  When Brad reveals the Frog Lake dermatitis spreading under his shirt, the judge rules in Marshall’s favor, though only fines Gruber Pharmaceuticals $25,000 of the $25,000,000 Marshall had originally sought.  Marshall questions the judge's decision, but the man explains that he doesn’t want to bankrupt such an important company.

Upon finding that Barney had only ever been at the courthouse in handcuffs as part of a young magic enthusiast’s club, Robin and Ted admit to having embellished their own stories as well, Robin actually winning an award for best-behaved hotel guest and Ted’s mugshot coming from his job in renaissance fair stocks.

Future Marshall explains to the judiciary committee that he had another dream of fishing with his son, updated to reflect how little good came of Marshall’s valiant struggle, though in fact one small measure of positivity came of the affair.  For you see, Brad confronted Marshall at MacLaren’s the following day, confessing he’d felt inspired by Marshall’s dedication, and taken a job at Marshall’s firm to fight the good fight.  Agreeing to smooth out their conflict over brunch, Marshall recognizes from Brad’s words that he himself would prefer to become a judge, the real reason he appears before the State Judiciary Committee in the future.  Though it could take time, the council agrees to consider his request.

Back in the present, Barney and Robin finally agree to confront their mutual awkwardness, and Barney resolves to take things back to normal by abandoning any efforts to win her back.  Robin happily agrees to return to being friends, but finds herself somewhat conflicted by the idea when Barney walks away to get drinks.

Later, the group all walk down the street, and the children all flee from Lily, as in her flashback.  Lily comin’!

It really is a shame that so much of the current season of 'How I Met Your Mother' was weighed down by the relationships with Victoria and Nick, given how much more fulfilling the last two episodes have felt.  "Twelve Horny Women" relies heavily on Joe Manganiello's ample comedic chops, but still provides the most laughter the 'HIMYM' gang has brought all season.  It's also interesting to get a taste of Marshall's future applying for judgeship, but it remains to be seen if the thread will be revisited anytime soon, without any context for the scenes.  Far from a perfect effort to be certain, but we hope the next run of episodes keeps "Twelve Horny Women"s quality up, getting the season back on track.

Did you get a thrill out of “Twelve Horny Women,” or wind up feeling itchy all over?  Do you think it made for a solid entry into the (potentially) final season? Join us next week for an all-new episode recap of ‘How I Met Your Mother’ “Lobster Crawl” on CBS!